help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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