i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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