She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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