hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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