i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize