I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
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Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
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There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Randomize