I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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