What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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