I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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