I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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