i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
