I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
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Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I just want nice things and good sex
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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