"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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