I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
