On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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