That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
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Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
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Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
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