You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize