Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.