It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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