bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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