This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize