Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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