She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Im part way to drunk.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
