Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I am naked and annoyed.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Randomize
