I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
