i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
foreskin is a definite game changer
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
