i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
