I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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