i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
No subtext here. People are naked.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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