But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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