The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
No subtext here. People are naked.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
