im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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