I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Randomize
