a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
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