like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
