what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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