Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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