suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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