...so i touched it.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
