is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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