I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
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