I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He passed out mid-signature
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
