New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize