I feel like I'm in dance class right now
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
