I wanna passion pit in your ass
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Randomize