I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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