but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
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