I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Randomize
