Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
