What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
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