So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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